What My Mum Never Taught Me About Love

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“If you can’t see the beauty in her quirks, if you don’t think that maybe she might be a little bit of magic, don’t you dare say that she is just a girl; because she’s a masterpiece”.

Many special people will cross your path in life, wee one – some that your parents adore and you don’t – some your best friends mistrust while you proclaim the contrary – and some who, despite their wondrously unique qualities, leave you wondering if you really, truly know them – deep down inside. That sacred connection – that honesty – that goes by the cheesy but essential barometer called intimacy.

What’s Your Definition Of Love?

Here’s mine.

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When I was a little girl, my mother told me true love is crystal clear. That any doubts – any – mean it’s wrong. And while I understand her abject confidence (knowing my dad as I do) – I just don’t agree. My view of love is a little more shaded, grayscale and a little less black and white. Call it wisdom, experience or naivety, that’s the case.

An awesome, realistic, freeing way to be? Hell yeah. But vulnerability inducing, truth-facing and a whole lot more terrifying – too bloody right.

Where’s The Line Between Storybook Romance And Reality?

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I don’t pretend to be an expert on love – and frankly – mistrust people who do – but what I do know is that while it can be hard to navigate between your wants and needs, your rationale and your instinct, love and lust – the intention to remain real – true – and honest – are all that really count.

A close chum shared her fiancé’s thoughts after an argument recently. His words moved me. “No matter what happens, we have the fundamentals, so we’ll always be ok”.

Safety, reassurance, maturity, knowing. Faith that the fundamentals will carry you through.

How Can You Apply This To Your Daily Life?

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So for any of you wee ones who might be worrying your little minds away this evening, remember this – trust the vibes you get – energy doesn’t lie. Think about how you feel when your instincts are in check and where you feel this – and how you feel when you’re letting your fears get the better of your sense of knowing – and how this manifests itself differently in your body.

For vulnerability is a complex business. At times it can be a great yardstick for danger – like a red traffic light screaming at you – and at other times it can feel like a wobbly, knee-jerk reaction to irrational fear.

But what ultimately separates that fear in the pit of your stomach from true peace of mind – is that intangible sense of knowing and trust – knowing that your bottom line can be met, that the abstract feeling in your gut is right and that lasting love will see you for the masterpiece that you really are.

Sweet dreams xo

#love

#honesty

#intimacy

#knowing

#trust

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