Why Learning Not To Judge Is The Greatest Gift Of All

Which side of the line do you fall, wee one? How empathetic are you? When was the last time you truly listened, suspending your own views of what you’d do in the same situation and resisting judging someone for taking a different approach? When was the last time you truly tried to step into another’s world, thoughts and outlook – entirely?

If coaching has taught me one thing, it’s this. Judging is as easy as breathing in and out but it takes little account of another person’s values, drivers, sensitivities, experiences and ideals. In short, that another may be entirely different to you – on many levels – near and far – and has as much right to a different way of thinking as you do yours.

For even if in little ways, we are all wholly unique beings with different tunes singing in our ears, different visions beaming from our eyes and different feelings weaving in our hearts.

From the different school environments we grow up in to our different families, friends, boyfriends and jobs, we are all shaped in entirely different ways. And these run deep in forging our identities and day to day views.

In other words, we don’t see things as they are – we see them as we are. There is no absolute truth – no right or wrong – we all have different realities – all the time.

How Can You Apply This In Your Daily Life?


So today, dear Gazer, take more time to listen – to really hear what someone is saying to you. Try to resist that inner voice inside judging what you’re hearing – because all that really is is a projection of your world – your thoughts – your ideas – on to someone who comes from quite another – no matter how similar or different.

Even if they look the same as you, sound the same as you, seem the same as you, dig deep and try to respect and honour the beauty of how they see the world.

There really is nothing better than feeling heard. If you’re the listener, you’ll learn more about worlds different to your own and deepen your understanding of another – and from the other side, you’ll feel loved, respected and in the quietness of that interchange, much closer to hearing things as they really are.

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